lost

sometimes i wonder, who am i?
i don't know...
how am i like??
i don't know either...

do you remember how it feels like when something snaps?? how does 'something' snaps?? it gets stretched, or maybe it is 'cut'.. either way, it breaks and like rubber, comes back and catches you when you least expect it..
its inky black again, and its worse than ever, spreading like a mist.. i thought the reason for this excercise it so that it would not spread..

always so sure that i can hold on,
always constant...
always capable of giving them the sunshine that they needed..

where is the me that i once was??
i may not have always liked her, but she was me.. and i am her..
no matter how hard it is, i always knew that i can just turn around and see her staring at me
even if its a blank lost glance from her, i know she is there..
that is what's matters...

but now, it is my turn to look..
blank, black..
she's not there anymore..
i didn't miss her then..
i didn't realise her missing..
but they did.. they looked at me, but don't see 'me'..
they probed my heart, but can't feel 'me'..
why didn't i see it then??
i miss her now..
will you please come back??

it feels so vast and empty without you.. the magic lost, the sparkle missing..
in the end, it took a gentle reminder to make me 'see' again..
it hurt to hear it from a friend, but thanks for pointing it out..
i am nothing without you..

i need you.. now..